If there is one thing I’ve learned over time is that some people are just lucky they are always in the right time and right place all the time. Then for everyone else like myself who has no luck with most things you have to work hard and most of the time it pays off. Not all the time, but most the time the hard work pays off and I’ve learned when to put the extra effort in.
Of course, with anything I can reflect back and think, did I do enough? Did I say the right thing? Perhaps I’m not as good as I thought I possible could be. I’m just reflecting on my possible job opportunities and it just makes me wonder as I sit here in limbo. I got a second call back, but don’t think that went as well as the in-person interview and option 2 I was supposed to hear from someone else, but never did. That makes me think that one of the other 2 possible candidates has more of what they are looking for rather than me.
It would have been such a great opportunity with either option, but where I was thinking “oh what if they both want me” to now “I’d take either if they’d just call me.” All the while my hard work isn’t paying off and I feel so unwanted. This adds to my lack of self-esteem even more since I’ve been looking for almost a year now next month for a job and it’s hard to even get an interview. Shooting in the dark is so hard.
I’ve learned that it definitely comes down to who you know or sometimes an extreme amount of experience can make up for that, but I have neither of those. So where do I land? Barely on anyone’s radar. It’s the middle of Wednesday and I should hear back from one of my options today or tomorrow if they aren’t super busy. The other option I should hear back from by the end of the week. I’m also waiting to hear back from my doctor.
So the waiting is killing me. I put in another application yesterday because I have a feeling neither of my options are going to work out and that sucks to get so close only to be shut down. I’m going to be pretty bummed when I get the ty but no ty, but at least I didn’t really expect to get either job.
On the flip side something complete off that subject is that today despite sleeping like shit is gym day #2 of attempt 2. I say attempt 2 because last week was such a miserable week I didn’t go at all to the gym. Anyway I was really impressed with myself as week 2 I’m already a lot stronger than I was 2 weeks ago. I picked up some weights that I was doing 2 weeks ago and was like “nah, this won’t do” so I went heavier. It was nice. Hitting the treadmill was hard because it is so damned boring. I do the treadmill because I’m trying to get steps for not only myself, but for insurance. It is really tough with a job that you sit down at to get 10k steps a day. At least my wife is in a challenge and trying to walk more than she normally does so that is getting me more steps than usual and I’m making sure to get my 10k.
I’m looking forward to my second workout. I like this plan so far and I know from my last workout attempt that I need to push myself so I’m using the bodybuilding.com app to track my workouts and then I can look back and see that, oh hey, I lifted 20lbs last week and it was relatively easy, let’s do 25lbs this week. That helps so much.
This week my legs don’t hurt as much as they did the first week, which is nice, but they still hurt. Since I pushed my chest a bit more than last week that hurts more than last week. My back is ok so I obviously didn’t push it enough. So even though I’m tired I’m really excited to go lift. I haven’t felt that way in a long time. I love lifting weights and trying to mold my body. I’m not going to talk about my weight until Friday as Friday is my “official” weigh in day (so sayeth me).
I’ve been doing good on water intake. I’m going with the 50% of your weight in ounces theory for the water so I know I need to drink at least 6 tumblers full of water. I did soda yesterday and today so I’m not doing so well on water. I hit 6 or 5 yesterday, but I had some water. Today I’m only 1 tumbler in so I’m going to be chugging water soon as I try to hit that goal. Alright well it’s lunch time so I’m going to head out and eat my salad since I didn’t make lunch last night after my super long walk. I hope I receive good news that I can report back. Wish me luck, but until then…
- Later Days!